the short wanderer

Hariku sering tuah hadir bertamu Seakan dunia hanya untuk diriku Kasih alam sering menyebelahiku Seolah tiada ruang selain diriku Namun sepi ku rasa walau ku sempurna Takut ku pada indah dunia tak selama Kelompang di jiwa, tiada rasa untuk mendekati-Nya Tuhan ku bimbangi nikmat zikir ku tiada lagi Rasa asyik ini, ku sangka kau redhai Hampa sang nurani kerna ku ingin bebas, rasa hilang Tuhan dekatiku pada yang Kau cintai Naluri lumrahku memanggil untuk kembali Jauhlah diri dari pujukan dunia Oh Tuhan jauhkan daku Dari rasa hilang ini Hariku sering tuah hadir bertamu Betapa ku bimbangi Hilang dari pandanganmu * * * "Asar 1:45 p.m., Maghrib 4:06 p.m. Kelas ANTHXX 1.00-2.00 p.m., ARCLXX 2.00-4.00 p.m." Asar... Sempat? Tak sempat? Sempat tak? Sempat kot.  Soalan wajib harian setiap kali tiba musim sejuk. Satu-satunya 'exercise' yang aku lazimi waktu tahun pertama mungkin inilah; berlari dari bangunan akademik ke hostel untuk menyelamatkan...

Alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah. The past month has been a long ride, especially with a lot of unexpected things that were happening - the sudden travel arrangement, the cancelled flights, the unexpected transfer and much longer quarantine period, and so on. Looking at how stressful the situation was, I thought I was coping with it badly, but I was surprised to find out that I was actually dealing with it better than some people. Nonetheless, the past week has been physically and mentally draining! I guess God knows I couldn't bear with anything more than what I've went through hence I am where I am at this very moment. No words can describe how grateful I am to be where I am today.  I don’t usually write stuff that I don’t feel good about. But since this was an exceptional situation, I think it forms an important part of my life. Also, since our perspectives change as we grow, I hope there's always something new that I can learn from it whenever I look b...

Last month, I was supposed to meet up with someone for a catch up session. I have talked about her  in my blog before; she is a lovely lady, half Malaysian half Irish, who is working at the library of my institute for... I'm not sure how long lol shame on me XD Her name is Safina but I call her Kak Fina, because... that's just what Melayu people do 😂 I can't recall a moment that we don't chat whenever I bumped into her at the library - even when she had someone to attend to at the counter, she'd always look for me in the library after she's done with her 'customer'. She always asked me how I am doing. Well you know, when it comes to people that I'm not really close to, the answer has always been "I'm good". But since she has passed that 'boundary of strangers', my answers vary a bit from time to time (I think, lol). When I was not feeling really good about something, I would tell her, " Oh well, x happened, and I'...

It does feel a bit odd to write about this. I don't usually write about things until it actually happened; in other words, I don't go and brag about my life plans to the public - oh well if you know me well enough, keeping people in the loop is not really my thing. So this one is a bit different (hence the title), not only because I'm writing about things that have not yet happened, but because these events; it turns out that they may never happen... Well, at least not in 2020. I started off this year being very excited about 'a new phase of life'. A new phase that will begin after I get a degree scroll. I was looking forward to A LOT of things. Literally, A LOT. January was like any other conventional hectic month. I went to 3 different countries at the end of 2019 and was definitely working my a** off to complete all of my submissions. It was between the end of January  to early February when I made all these plans for my post-undergraduate degree...