Skip to main content

Of Supplications (& Health)

Period pain sucks.


Oh well, any kind of pain sucks I guess. But as it is notoriously known/perceived (please don't quote me on this isk isk), women get extra 'sensitive' during their menstruation period so here's a random note from an annoyed version of me as I went through the so-called period of hormonal imbalance last month lol

-

I had literally just put the rice on the stove, when my stomach had a random muscle cramp attack. "Well, forget about cooking then" I said to myself in frustration while waiting in the kitchen for my rice to cook and the pain to (hopefully) subside. It did went away after a while, but I couldn't risk another cramp in the kitchen so I went back to my room after putting the rice in a container.

When I was back in the room, and low-key wishing someone can cook for me instead, my heart suddenly whispered, "It must be hard to struggle with an illness (especially a chronic one) and having to get someone else to take care of you." I stared at my face in the mirror, and my heart made a spontaneous prayer. I said, O Allah, grant me a healthy body so that I wouldn't have to trouble anyone with my condition. If you know me, then you would probably know how much I value my independence. I love doing things on my own, and I would love to stay doing things myself. One day I'll probably get old, but God please, I hope even on the days my hair turns grey I would still be able to 'stand on my own feet'.

Earlier that morning, I was watching a video on Instagram about how a blind man go around his life chores: it started with him showing how his shirts have Braille on it to let him know what is written on the shirt and what colour it is, then a footage of him chopping onions and making tacos on his own, and ended with clips of his judo training session. 

Towards the end of the video, he mentioned that he was training judo for the Paralympic. My heart leapt, "This guy is truly amazing!" The amount of positivity he is spreading through that video is unexplainable and it warms my heart to see that he didn't let his disability to stop him. He has a really supportive wife too, and the positive remarks in the comment section warms my heart even more.

I wonder if I would be that optimistic and energetic, had I been the one with that kind of disability. Allah says in the Qur'an that He won't test you beyond anything you can bear, but the idea of losing my sight is quite terrifying - especially as I am already wearing glasses myself (I've definitely been depending so much on my eyes (and my legs!) while enjoying myself in London!). So while He still let me have this 'gift of sight' on loan, it goes without saying that I should take a good care of it.




If you're familiar with al-Ma'thurat then it's highly likely that you are familiar with this one du'a:

اللَّهُمَّ عَافِنِي فِي بَدَنِي، اللَّهُمَّ عَافِنِي فِي سَمْعِي، اللَّهُمَّ عَافِنِي فِي بَصَرِي، لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا أَنْتَ

which is taken from a longer hadith narrated by Abu Daud. It roughly translates into: “O Allah, grant health in my body, O Allah, grant health in my hearing, O Allah, grant health in my sight. There is no god worthy of being worshiped except You.”

I used to read the al-Ma'thurat on a daily basis back then, which means I recited the prayer a lot too, but very few of them were recited 'from the heart'. This day with random little occurences made me realise that supplications are a lot more meaningful when you have 'reasoning' to come with it.

Praying for a good health vs. praying for a healthy body AND mind to be independent.

Praying for wealth vs. praying for financial capacity/capability to sustain myself and give out sedekah or do charity.

Praying for sustenance vs. praying for sustenance so that I can function well and be of use to myself and other people.

Praying for a long age vs. praying for a long age so that I can get the opportunity to serve my family and the society.


I reflected on supplications I usually make; it's usually very brief and not purposeful enough. I think if I know the real motive behind making those prayers, I can probably be more attentive, sincere, and passionate about the du'as instead of just repeating words I had "memorised over the years".

I envy those people who can literally cry while making their du'as because they know how helpless they are, or those who always smile while making them because they have so much faith in the power of supplication; it simply shows how much they put their heart into it. 

Hopefully the next time I recite all those du'as, not only those made after solah but also those doa sebelum makan, doa selepas makan, doa masuk/keluar tandas, doa naik kenderaan, doa bangun tidur and so on, I would be more mindful of why I am turning to God asking for those things in the first place. (I'm still struggling!)




p/s: at the time of publishing this post (March 4th), my parents and sisters has been infected with covid-19. If you can spare some time praying for the health and wellbeing of my family, I would greatly appreciate it :) jazakallah! 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Arkeologi?: Satu Perjalanan

Kira-kira lapan bulan yang lepas aku ada tulis satu ' post ' tentang subjek arkeologi, atau secara spesifiknya, aku cuba nak kongsi sikit (berdasarkan pengalaman yang tak berapa nak ada ni) apa yang ada dalam bidang arkeologi ni. Tanpa aku sangka, susulan post aku yang tak seberapa tu, aku mula dapat beberapa soalan dekat ruangan 'comments' dekat post tu pasal bidang yang aku tengah belajar ni. Mungkin selepas aku dah terangkan serba sedikit apa yang ada dalam bidang arkeologi ni, ada segelintir pembaca blog aku ni yang berminat nak menjadi ahli arkeologi. Alhamdulillah, rasa bangga pun ada, rasa terharu pun ada... TAPI Saudara sekalian, aku bukanlah orang yang sudah pun bekerja dalam bidang ni, apatah lagi orang yang berpengalaman dalam bidang arkeologi ni. Maka coretan kali ni ialah coretan secara rendah dirinya sebagai seorang hamba yang baru saja berjinak-jinak dalam bidang ni selama 15 bulan... (bukan 15 tahun ya!) Kepada sesiapa yang dah pun ba...
10 comments
Read more

Arkeologi?

“Archaeology is about everything.” – Mark Roberts, 11.06.2018 Memandangkan tak ramai orang buat course ni (setahu aku), mungkin orang tertanya-tanya apa yang ada dalam archaeology degree ni sebenarnya.  Bila lecturer aku cakap ‘everything’, memang dia maksudkan  everything .  Maaf kalau agak bias sebab besar kemungkinan aku akan kongsi daripada perspektif seorang pelajar UCL, instead of pelajar arkeologi secara amnya huehue Arkeologi ni, nak dipendekkan cerita, nak kaji cara hidup orang zaman dulu. Tapi, cara nak mengkaji tu sangatlah luas, therefore this subject is very, very interdisciplinary.   Hmm jadi, arkeologi ni, pasal apa sebenarnya?  1.        It is about history , politics , and economics Kalau nak faham orang, kita kena cuba letak diri kita kat tempat orang tu kan? Macam itulah arkeologi. Kalau nak tahu macam mana dan kenapa certain things happened in the past , kita kena ta...
32 comments
Read more

"All is Well!"

"Orang kata, big challenges are for people with big heart " This post is going to be filled with loads of quotes, and the one I just begin my post with is one of the first quotes that comes to my mind when I feel like ' everyday is a tough day at this point '. And recently it has been a quote I am reminded of the most. This academic term has been the toughest time I have ever had in my university years so far. Moments of freaking out, worrying and stressing out while trying to sort things out were COUNTLESS. But anyway, that's life (okay while writing this phrase I literally sing the Frank Sinatra song 😂 so for the fun of it, let's just put that bit here hahaha). That's life (that's life) I tell ya, I can't deny it I thought of quitting, baby But my heart just ain't gonna buy it And if I didn't think it was worth one single try I'd jump right on a big bird and then I'd fly *SIDETRACKED* (I am sorry for an early...
3 comments
Read more

Letting God

No incident in life is an accident. When my best friend first gave me the book 'The Art of Letting God' by Ustaz Mizi Wahid, I somehow had the gut that it will become something I really need in the not so distant future. Only a week after that I came to realise why Allah sent me the gift through her. Being a scholar of this one particular organisation (if you know, you know) for more than three years now, I have always been convinced (by my own self if not other people) that we will be guaranteed with a job by the time we graduate from universities. Not to say that I've been working less harder than I'm supposed to all this while, but I cannot deny that part of me has always been having this assurance that the beginning of my career is kinda sorted out by the time I got my degree scroll in a few years time. But...the reality turns out to be taking a whole different path; life seems to be harsher than what we initially thought. Little did I realise I was a bit dis...
1 comment
Read more

Oh My English!

"Are you born in Britain?" my Romanian teacher once asked me. "Is English your first language?" asked my British friend, Alex, a friend I made from my summer school. "Did you go to any English tuition class?" asked Ong, my internship colleague. Disclaimer:  do not put a high expectation on me! I can assure you that my English is not that good... well, the fact that I had to repeat my IELTS last time is one of the proofs hehe But I just feel like looking back at how I get to speak in English, (though not really fluently, just enough to be able to have a conversation with other people) given the fact that I am such a kampung girl and English is undoubtedly something very, very foreign to me. My family speak full Malay at home. My dad speaks Perak dialect in his hometown, while my mum speaks Javanese with her family. So maybe for the sake of simplicity, all of us have been using standard Malay as our first language despite living in Terenggan...
2 comments
Read more